Of course I have to write a blog post about almost dying. I pretty much said everything about it on Facebook, but I am going to write about it here, too.
I almost died, you guys! At first I thought it was kind of funny, like, haha, I totally could have died but I did not die.
Then I thought about it, and I COULD HAVE LITERALLY DIED.
You see, what happened was my blood sugar went really low while I was asleep. In 25 years of being Diabetic, I have woken up when this happens. Every time I woke up. Never have I not woken up. Usually I start having a nightmare about blood sugar levels, and then I wake up sweaty and I know my blood sugar is low. I kind of considered it my super power – in 25 years I have never passed out or needed medical assistance because of my blood sugar.
This time, I did not wake up. There was also zero reason my blood sugar should have dropped that low in the first place (it was about 20). ALSO – my blood sugar has been lower than that and I have been conscious. My mom randomly decided to look in my room at 6am and tell me to turn over because I was snoring weirdly. My mom is never up at 6am. She also does not usually come into my room. She tried to wake me up, and then my dad tried, and I did not wake up.
As far as I knew, I was asleep and not dreaming. Then I started having really weird dreams about people standing over my bed looking at me. In the dream, it wasn’t anyone I knew, it was strange men. Then I actually woke up, and the men were really there, they weren’t a dream at all. And I had an IV in my arm. And my parents were there looking paler than anyone I have ever seen. And my first thought was that my blood sugar was low and this wasn’t really happening.
Here is the thing about low blood sugar – and I have written about this before – when it is low, it seems like your body and face are not connected to the rest of you. Like you are watching someone else sweat and eat three bowls of cereal, but it is not actually you. You can stare at someone right in front of you, and you hear them like they are under water and you aren’t really sure if they are there or not.
So I wake up, and I was 99% sure they were not really there, but they were. So I said “Oh my gosh, I thought you were in my dream but you’re really here”. Surreal does not even begin to describe waking up to people in your room. I didn’t have my glasses on, so that made it even more weird. One of the EMT guys said something like “It’s not every day you wake up to guys as cute as us in your room” and I said “Where are my glasses so I can see how cute you are?” and someone handed me my glasses. They were cute. And I was wearing my CLASSIEST pajamas – a wife beater tank top and shorts. The last time I shaved my legs was 2012. I was also probably drooling, but I don’t know that for sure.
30 minutes later, the EMTs are gone, I’m eating peanut butter toast, and I realized my cat has not made an appearance. I was positive he was in the house because he is not inclined to run outside, but we didn’t know if he got so scared, he just ran out with the EMTs, or what. So my parents scoured the neighborhood…and found a random black cat. I stayed in the house eating my toast and shaking a bag of treats and searching every corner. TWO HOURS later, Mr. Meow Meow came downstairs. I have no idea where he could have been.
But anyway – I could be dead right now and that is a weird thing to think. If I were, I am happy to report it would have been painless and I would not have known anything happened. The shock was waking up, not NOT waking up. So here’s to dying in your sleep, but also, I do not want to die! That is not something that should happen yet. If my mom didn’t randomly stop by my room, I would never have woken up. If I lived alone, boom, dead. This is why I will never live alone – I must marry a gay man.
So that is my story. You’ve all heard it at this point, but now I have written it in my blog, so that means it officially really happened.
Here is a picture of Jenna holding a pile of kittens.
Here is a picture of Mr. Meow Meow.