Be forewarned, this is not a funny post, or a nice post, or a pleasant post and it is not my typically optimistic post. I might even use some really bad swear words.
I am livid. I have described in detail how gullible and naive I am, so you just have to assume I fall for a lot of things. I am a little sick of falling for things and I am sick of people who get away with the crap they pull.
I am going to name names and I am going to give details. (Edited to add I sort of changed names because someone told me I might get sued, and as it turns out, I do care – the only real name is the first one) I don’t care who reads it or what the consequences are. Why should I protect the people who have literally committed crimes? I should be allowed to say their names wherever I want.
I’ll start with the event that put me over the edge. Jesse Dombeck scammed me out of a lot of money. This piece of shit said he was dying of a horrible disease that he inherited from his abusive father, he had just been evicted from his apartment and had nowhere to go, and was going to kill himself. I went to high school with him. I didn’t know him, I never interacted with him, but my high school was small, everyone knew names. I made the mistake of putting on my superhero cape and going to his apartment to stop him from killing himself. I believed everything he told me. I gave him $660 to pay his “rent”. My credit card was in my purse before I picked him up, and strangely enough, not there after. Then came the fraudulent charges. His family has since confirmed that he has done this to a whole list of people, he is not dying, he was not evicted and he isn’t going to kill himself. He is the one who put me over the edge because in my moron brain, I thought, I can’t let this guy have nowhere to live. I figured he wasn’t going to kill himself, because that was clearly just an attention thing. But someone tells me “I have nowhere to go”, my thought is that I should probably save them. So because of this (by the way, I’m fairly certain I actually paid his dealer, not a landlord), I overdrew my bank account paying for my own prescriptions. Then I got paid, and within a few days, after paying SOME of the bills that I was behind on because of giving away $660 that I could not afford to give away, I have $1.86 in my bank account. I don’t get paid again until the 15th. Who is screwed, here? My parents. Because now if anything comes up before the 15th, I have to ask them for money, and they aren’t exactly rolling in it, either. So, first on the list – Jesse Dombeck.
Second on the list is someone who I actually am going to keep anonymous because I promised her I would, and unlike every single other person in the world, I keep my promises when I am able to. I will call this person Jane. I actually do have a friend named Jane, but this isn’t her. I made up the name Jane. All of these events are also made up, but mirror real life events. I trusted Jane to no end, we were fantastic friends. Then Jane told a really big lie that had a really big effect on my life in many aspects. I forgave Jane because she seemed to be truly sorry that she did it. But Jane proceeded to tell really big lies quite a few more times, each time, begging my forgiveness and dragging me along in her particular scam. This was more of a mental scam – Jane never asked for money. She asked for plenty of help with things like college classes and had no problem at all letting me do work for her, but she did not ask for money. Jane would invite me out with friends, and then completely ignore me to the point of turning her back on me so it actually looked like I was sitting alone and not with the group. She would invite me out to dinner and then get a phone call from someone else and leave me at dinner alone. Jane spent a good many years lying to me and then stringing me alone to believe she had changed, and then lying to me again and in between all the lying, she accepted all that she could from me – emotional support, college help (a lot of it), rides to places she didn’t want to drive to, but mostly, she sucked every emotional cell out of me in my attempts to make her happy. It turned out that the only time she was happy was when she was torturing me in some way. I finally realized this, and Jane and I are no longer friends. I do not trust Jane and probably never will. We say hi once in awhile, but I am so damaged from this relationship that Jane is the #2 culprit on the list of People Who Turned Me Evil And Stole Part Of My Soul. Jane still keeps secrets but says we could be friends still, she’s just going to be the kind of friend who doesn’t tell the truth and lies about things. I opted not to accept that offer.
Number Three Offender is Colleen. This psychotic bitch does not have a single friend for more than a year. Everyone else learned quickly enough that she is unstable, and ditched her as soon as they could. She has no friends from high school, no friends from college. Who remained her friend for longer than a year? I did. And guess what!? She lied. She even lied on a police report. She scammed me for about 3 months before I realized it, and then denied knowing anything about the scam when the police asked her about it. She smells like feet and she has Borderline Personality Disorder, undiagnosed and untreated, and that is the scariest form of it. I don’t really hate people, I have always been happy and easy to forgive and forget, but I hate Colleen. Luckily my real friends have never acted even remotely close to the way Colleen did, so she only took a small part of my soul, because my real friends proved that’s not how normal people work. Colleen screwed me over in a huge, giant way.
Number Four – Bitch Hog. She was the career advisor or something at Notre Dame. Rumor has it she has since been fired for showing prejudice against particular students. My story begins with my senior thing that I had to do to graduate. Those of us who did not want to pursue a career in psychology had to interview 6 psychologists in different fields of psychology and write a paper about it. I did those interviews, and I found some of the most interesting people to interview. None of them would see me in person, they didn’t have time for a visit, so I bought phone tapping equipment and asked if I could record our phone interview. I did not, by any means, do an outstanding job on this paper. I would have given me a C+/B-. Bitch Hog, however, gave me an F. She also decided to tell me this two weeks before graduation. In the college bookstore that was filled with students. Her exact words were “Oh, Darcy, by the way, you did the paper completely wrong and you’ve failed, you won’t be graduating. If you have questions, you can make an appointment to see me” and she left the store, leaving me standing there with about 18 people staring at me in shock. During the time period that I was working on this paper, Bitch Hog never responded to a single e-mail or voicemail I left for her. I told her exactly what I was doing and asked her to contact me back to make sure it was all correct. I appealed her decision and everyone told me “She has tenure, we won’t overturn her decision”. No one looked at the paper. No one questioned why she didn’t contact me if what I was doing was completely wrong, when I kept her up to date the whole time. So I failed. I didn’t graduate. I went back ten years later and asked the then head of the psych department to look at my paper, and I asked if it was wrong. She said no, it was exactly what was required. Bitch Hog told me I failed because I was supposed to do the interviews in person and spend an entire day “shadowing” each psychologist. At the time, I contacted each psychologist and asked if I would have been allowed to shadow them, and they said of course not, I was in undergrad, not grad school, and psychology is not something you just “sit in on”. The then head of the psych department said it has never been a requirement to spend the entire day with the person, or even to do the interview in person. So Bitch Hog can kiss my ass – she wasn’t even a professor. OH – and this is the same woman who was supposed to help arrange internships for students. I wanted to be a forensic (criminal) psychologist. She said she would let me volunteer at a home for profoundly disabled adults who can’t communicate or function physically on their own. I said that I’ve actually volunteered there before, and I am interested in criminal psychology. She said “You’re a typical arrogant psych major, you think you’re too good to work with retarded people”. Then she refused to set me up with an internship. Bitch Hog sucks and is part of the reason I have given up my mission to save the world, and instead I will only save animals and not trust a single human being EVER.
Then comes Skeezeball Jones. He worked with me at the bookstore. He applied for the same position I did at the same time. The whole time before the decision was made, he was happy, cooperative, and what appeared to be genuinely nice. He was lying about that. When the manager made the decision, he talked to Skeezeball first. Skeezeball told him that he really respects him, and whatever decision he makes is obviously the right one. He was also lying about that. Then the manager told him I am the one who got the position. Skeezeball screamed at him about what an idiot he is and how he doesn’t know how to manage and makes horrible decisions, then he came storming out of the back room and slammed past me so hard I thought he was going to punch me. After that, he would do things that were evil. I would say “Skeezeball, could you do this buy?” and he would say “Sure” and then really loudly he’d say “Darcy, if you can’t do something, just ask me for help”. Or I’d say “Skeezeball, where did you put the phone?” and he’d say quietly “On the counter” and then really loudly “Darcy, if you can’t figure it out, just stop asking me, I can’t do everything for you”. That continued until he transferred. It was horrible. I went home every night crying because I do not handle psychological warfare very well at all. Skeezeball was also a very physically violent person and would often throw tantrums in the back room that involved punching, kicking and yelling. I was terrified of working alone with him because I was positive he was going to kill me one day. I think he ended up getting fired for some sort of sexual harassment issue, but I don’t know for sure. I do know he was a misogynistic bastard who hated women. He was also very short.
For my last on the List Of People Who Have Turned Me From Good To Evil, a combination of everyone who has ever told me some sob story to get me to give them money, to get me to believe that they aren’t lying to me, or to get me to donate to their cause when they actually didn’t need the money. Specifically this one guy who did a kickstarter campaign to raise money for surgery for his dog who was hit by a car. I gave him a generous amount of money. In the end, his final e-mail said “Thanks for the donations, my parents said they’d pay for the surgery, so everything is good”. So….you had parents the whole time who would have helped? And you didn’t give me my money back?
I’m going to start a Kickstarter campaign for people to donate money to me to pay for their sins. Mostly I’m talking about men. Men are usually the ones who lie and cheat and have no souls. They are the ones who have defeated me completely and made me not want to save the world. I will always help any animal anywhere in the world, but I will never again help a human unless it is someone I actually truly know, like Mary or Karyn or Sasha or Erin or Tiffany or Leah or Dawn or…ok, there are quite a few people I’d help without a second thought but quite frankly, they are all women.
Because I haven’t turned completely evil yet, I would like to say that there are PLENTY of people in life who have it way worse than my situation – I wouldn’t even dare compare my situation to most people’s. But it is my situation and the only one I can comment on, and the repetitive psychological beatings (and financial beatings) have put me over my edge. Someone else’s edge is probably a lot different than mine. I want people to stop lying, not that I’ll ever believe them at this point, and to stop tricking me. But even if they did stop, I won’t believe them. Jane could do nothing but tell me the truth from here until eternity and I will never believe a word she says.
This officially concludes my life changing, personality changing, soul changing crisis.
Feel free to Ask the Darcy.