A long time ago when I was in college I started getting horrible pain in my left thigh and it felt like a thousand white hot needles were stabbing me. It was numb and I could poke my thigh and not actually feel anything but it hurt from the inside like all those white hot cold needles were stabbing me from the inside. I was pretty sure I was dying, as usual, and went to the doctor. She said “Your jeans are too tight”. Lo and behold, I stopped wearing tight jeans and it fixed everything.
Now, my jeans were not tight like you would think tight jeans are. They were stretchy jeans, and they looked normal and not like they were hugging every fat curve of my body, but they felt tight, especially because my thighs are bigger than any part of my body.
Now once again, I am having this problem. I actually found that it has a name, and the name is not Captain Tight Pants Disorder. It is: Meralgia Paresthetica – aka, Captain Tightpants Disorder. The thing is, I do not wear those kinds of jeans anymore. In fact, more often than not, I wear pajama bottoms or yoga pants. According to that website, the only reason left is that I am fat and Diabetic.
On a positive note, if this is the first “side effect” of having Diabetes for 22 years, I am ok with that. I can tolerate a numb thigh. I think it is more likely a side effect of being fat, though.
Speaking of jeans, I accidentally became a Black Friday 2am shopper, but I will write about that tomorrow!
**Edited to add, the first person to comment in the comments section on this blog (not on Facebook) about the origin of Captain Tight Pants wins a prize!
Here is a picture of Beau the Doberman wearing a Babushka.