Preface: Some of the pictures in this post may be sideways. Just turn your head to the side. They are normal when I am putting them in the post, but then sideways when I click “preview”.
I do not like to be hugged. I feel like I am being trapped and I just generally do not like it**. The biggest reason I do not like it is because I do not understand Hugging Etiquette. I have so many questions. If you know any of the answers, please tell me.
This blog is dedicated to Chris Hagesfeld.
- When hugging someone of the same or similar height, do your arms go over or under theirs? When and how is this decided?
- Where do you put your face? Do you turn towards them, away, or keep your face straight? With a taller person, this means you are smooshing your face into their chest and that can become awkward.
- If your chin comes up to their shoulder, do you just go ahead and rest it there?
- How long do you hold the hug? At what point is it acceptable to back out of it?
- If someone is taller than you, do you stand on tip toe to hug them or just go straight around the waist? And again, where do you put your face?
- If someone is shorter, and their head comes to your boob level, and you are a girl, do you hug them into your boobs or do you adjust so that does not happen?
- If you are hugging another girl (and you are also a girl), do you go for alternating boobs, straight up smooshed boobs, or do you stand a little bit apart and lean in so there is no boob touching at all?
- If you are sitting and someone hugs you while they are standing, do you try to hug back? Do you hug their arm, or whatever part of them you are able to, or do you just sit and get hugged?
- If I get side hugged, how do I know if the person is going to step away quickly, or just stand there with their arm around me indefinitely? Do I leave my arm around them?
- If you are the same-ish height, and your chin DOES go to their shoulder, do you keep looking straight ahead, turn away, or turn in? I do not want to snuzzle someone’s neck, and if someone snuzzled mine I would probably accidentally punch them because I do not want anything touching my neck.
- If the person is taller, and I choose to look away while I hug, then it basically ends up that my ear is against their chest. Is that ok?
- What if it is a girl and my ear ends up against her boob? Is THAT ok?
I thought about taking funny pictures to illustrate each of these, but that would basically be horrifying and I cannot do it. You will have to use your imagination.
**Some people are allowed to hug me. If you have hugged me and now fear that you traumatized me, you didn’t. Or maybe you did, I guess it really just depends on who you are.