Things That Do Not Taste Like Cheese.

This will probably surprise you, but I do not eat fast food.  Ok, I RARELY eat fast food.  Extremely rarely.  And when I do, it is usually just french fries. I will always get coffee beverages from fast food places, but I have not eaten a “sandwich” in a long time.  They just gross me out.  I used to be able to eat chicken nuggets by telling myself “This is not really chicken, it is some chicken flavored product” but then you know, beaks and feet and all that, and no more.

Tonight I went to Arby’s intending to get curly fries, and I found a voice unattached to me saying “…and a beef and cheddar sandwich”.  I thought, damn, that was weird.  And then I ate it.  It was so gross, but so good at the same time.  It helped that it was dark and I was driving, so I could not look at it while I was eating it.

Here is the thing about Arby’s Beef and Cheddar – it does not taste like cheese.  I mean, I know, it ISN’T cheese, it is manufactured cheese goo, but it should still at least taste like cheese.  This is the third in a series of things I have eaten that are supposed to taste like cheese but do not.

Campbell’s has those “handheld” soup things, where you nuke it and drink it rather than putting it in a bowl and using utensils to eat it.  I have been happy with these, particularly Chicken and Stars and Creamy Tomato.  But they got fancy and put out “Cheesy Chicken Quesadilla” and “Cheesy Baked Potato with Bacon (flavor)”.  I had really high hopes.  Like, really high.  The chicken one tastes like chicken broth with a hint of something spicy, and the potato one tastes like watery potatoes with fake bacon flavor.

If you are going to tell me something is cheesy, it damn well better be cheesy.  I am serious about my cheese, damn it.

Also, when you put these things in the microwave they hop around in a really scary way like they are being tortured to death.  I have a huge fear of being microwaved.  Or of microwaving something alive.  I would never do that, for the record.  But what if I was not paying attention some day and put a hamster in the microwave?  These thoughts plague me.  I do not ever want to be microwaved.

On to other things.

I love this and can not stop watching it.

To continue my theme of asking questions that no one answers, here is a two parter that you can avoid commenting on.  Do you eat fast food and what is your favorite kind of soup?  Answer in the comments below, we can keep up our trend of no one responding 😉

I still like each and every one of you, regardless of whether or not you comment.  And if you do comment, don’t tell anyone else, but I like you best.